Weird world.. weird people... silly me

Weird world.. weird people... silly me

Isnt it funny when girls r fightin over guys, thinkin
of all e strategies to get e guy's attention. n getting other people's partner seems like a
honour thing to do. got to accept e real world. innocent people!? haha.
tell mi tat i would believe tat...
really no mood to entertain those guys who thought i need their entertainment.
it makes mii feel sick.. all e same.

anyway...just let e world turn faster.
i need tat speedy head spinnin again..
cos it makes e world go faster...

got to accept e fact. i am foolish to realise it late
too late... too foolish...
wish i gt e energy to be like u.
wish i gt e heart to be like u.
enjoyin life like never before!

E world is still turnin

E world is still turnin

rem tat time i have high fever in school.
i cant even walk straight...
Iz accompany to busstop to take bus.
on e way out, he say i am so sick,
should ask mii bf come fetch mii, send mii home to rest.
HAHA!
well... one sword through my fragile body.
'oh! we broke up recently'
silence.
luckily my brain is not functionin tat time. if not i am goin to
head towards e toilet.
anyway by e time i reach e clinic, e world is turnin around mii...
haha. i just stare blank at e nurse, n try hard to listen to wat she is saying.

just now my dad talkin to relative on phone.
n yap. relative ask my dad about mii.
my dad is still in e dark, so he say i am attached.
another sword into my heart.

actually i dono y i am typin here. i cant stand myself free now.
every single day i would keep myself busy.
i don mind get sick... if only i can don think.
cos it makes me feel more foolish. i can never bear to hurt anyone.
so i choose to let u hurt me. but not e others... i cant stand it long.
give mii e basic respect will u. spare mii from all these 'slaps' on e face.
i am seriously embarrased...

Badly lost tis battle!

Badly lost tis battle!

so so so long didnt update my blog.
cos everyone is waitin for mii to update on tat.
n maybe ur bet had come through... yeah...
n don need to look at mii tat way.
i admit i lost... n tis time not only lost him,
but also lost myself. lost everything. lost e faith,
lost e face, lost e only confidence i have

yeap.i am wrong after all.
luckily now its holiday time, just only 2 weeks time,
every day in school is torture. cant stand those look.
they feel awkward, i can see e look.
n i still got to put on tat smile...
i look silly, don expect mii to suddenly burst into e toilet.
i am really drained tis time. all those looks, they knew, they saw.
n i got to face all these. face it.
wat u have done to me. RP is so small. everything tat u r doin is watched by others.
n i feel like a fool, waitin for others to explain to mii wat is happenin.

i am wrong. after all...
n i lost. she win. u win. everyone win.

Last year of today

Last year of today (09/08)

National day. memorable.
Not because of e firework.
But because of wat u whisper to my ear.
Know it can never be true. But it still feel warm
when thought of it. There r so many promises tat r
so sweet,and it would stay. ps: with mii

So many things. so many many many things.
People r laughin at mii... i don care.
At least i once make e choice with my heart,
and i am happy to make tat choice.
Who cares e outcome.

Now i realise its one sided thought.

Maybe all e while i think too much of myself.
Now i realise its one sided thought.

Tat fri,have my tuition lesson earlier. Rem u said may or may not go out tat day.
I thought tat if i am goin to go find u after my tuition wouldnt u be happy.
i smiled when i thought of tat. So... Straight away when i boared e train, i called u
to ask whether u r at home nt. 1st call no ans, i thought itz always like tat, u may nt heard it.
2nd call still no ans, think u sleepin. so waited for u to call me back. 15 min later reach gombak station,
called again.no ans.I am so hungry. thought maybe later can meet u for dinner. smile*
when reached tutee doorstep,u called. but goin to start lesson. so didnt pick up.
Haiz. tolerate e whole lesson. gastric pain... still teachin. After tat, i called u again. no ans. as usual, i would call another time. maybe straight away go mrt station find u. waited n waited... didnt call back. so i walk really slowly home. n there i am on e bed, fall asleep. haiz.
I just thought too highly of myself.
I thought i thought u would be happy tat i am goin to find u.
I thought i thought u missed my hug like how i missed ur hug.
I thought i thought if i am goin to hear ur voice before goin for tuition, wouldnt tat be nice. smile*
cos i am really tired, so wanted to hear ur voice.
I thought i thought its all i thought. Never did i realise i am being obsessive.
Compared to my friends,I already have so little time with u. So i make it up, by calling u.
so i am being obsessive. Haiz... When u wan, anything can become a reason.
It hurts, no... more than hurts. Its disappointed. so envy u to say 'it' so smooth, never would
i say tat out like e way u say it... cos i know i cant bring it out, cos i know i loved u
*love'ed'. I know i know i know... u just cant seem to bring out a reason. So i helped u. wont need to explain more. I go... i go... tat moment, i swollowed back wat i realise n off i go... All my fault, i believed too much in us... i thought i thought... i thought...
my fault, didnt realise tat only when u not with ur friends, then i can anyhow call to disturb u.
I realise late... understands more. I am just 'heartache'

The end...


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