A day without you!!!

A day without you!!!




Today is Monday, thought that everyone Monday blue so the sales wont be so good.
But not so bad, still manage to get more than 300 bucks sales.
Jeremiah came and look for me in the afternoon, he says he too bored at home.
Hiaz... really dono how my day went by de.
I really hope to have many customers today, so as to divert my attention from thinkin of Dear.
Good that Jeremiah came down, at least time pass faster.

Now i am home and i am really very tired...
Dear not able to use his own phone in Malaysia there, so can only through Vincent de phone to contact Dear. Just now reach home, sent msg to Dear to tell him i reach home le.
Thats what Dear ask me to do, to report to him everyday when i reach home.
But i think 2moro i wont be doin tat ba. cos its still Vincent de phone. I dont think its very nice to
use his phone also. Need to pay extra overseas de ma. Thought Dear will buy a card there to contact me, so will be more convinient, can call him also. but he didnt... haiz... What is he doin there now ah? Sleep le ma?
Haiz... Just feel that there is something missing, dear have not sent mii home for 2 days le.

2moro is another day... goiing to school for the council meeting... but wat am i goin to do after e meeting... I need sleep... think i will go home ba...

our Sat treat

Our Sat Treat/ My Treat




This sat dear bring me out to Raffles City, suppose to be our last day together
before Dear go Malaysia.
Dear treated me to New York New York restaurant,
he dont really think its up to 3 stars standard...cos of their way of service.
Ok, tats not e point... hahaha..
Dear ordered pork ribs... i ate it with dear ... nice nice
& i ordered teriyaki chicken steak.




Mmmm.. i ordered white chocolate Mocha (3 layers) and Dear have root beer...
But i wan to have a taste on Dear do de 7 layers Mocha... Do i get e chance?
after our meal, we ordered a set of ice cream with waffle. mmmm... Yummy.
E way dear cut the waffle with the ice cream makes me sing out happy birthday song to him unintentionally. hahaha... opps...

Dear spent near 60 bucks on our New York New York meal, luckily didnt listen to him to order another set of of crab meal with sea food.... lol... I think we will end up washin plates for the restrauant to pay for our bills. Thanks dear for the meal... so filling...We didnt even think of food when its dinner time. haha..

After that we went to play pool, so long didnt play le... paid for one hour, but only play a while.
Dear say very boring, can do other things de.
So we left loh...

To catch a movie at AMK hub... only 6 audience in the theater (inclusive of us)...
We watch this comedy show "Meet Dave"
Mii wanted to watch one of the Singapore movie.
" 12 lotus or e money not enough".
But dear say he dont support Singapore done movie, cos not worth the watch...
though kind of sad not to watch 12 lotus...
After watchin Meet Dave, i find it rather worth it... its an intersting show...

After the movie, its raining outside le... Rather late le... after walkin around the area, we lack of ideas what to do next, so thought of takin train home...
On train, Dear receive Jeremiah call for a drink...
in e end we end up meeting him at one of yishun coffeeshop, the guys drink but i am not allowed to touch... we chat and drink and watch the Olympic live show on the coffeeshop's TV.
Had quite a late night chatting with Jeremiah...
zzz.... tired but thinking its e last day with Dear, i rather we stay a little longer... but we still
have to take the last train into consideration de.
So left Jeremiah to take train at 11.15pm...
so thought of goin home le

Different turnout of my holiday

Different turnout of my holiday

Planned to fully use up my 2 and half week of school holiday for work.
Aimed to earn near to 1000 bucks for this month.
But now my target is gettin further and further away.

there are times where i want to spent time with Dear rather than go work.
It is just depressing to think that i will be in e different class with dear when our holiday ends.
It will means we are gettin lesser time together le.
Dear may have thought i really value money a lot, i realize this when he asks mii this once.
" you really need money ah"
Dear, its not about work which i think al the time, same as you, i also really wanted to have more time with u.
It wouldn't be lesser than the times you think.

This week actually only off tues and thurs... the rest of the days all work.
Tues off cos i am having Council meeting in school from 12 to 2pm.
Thurs off cos Dear is comin back From Malaysia. Promise him to take off de.
In e end, i realise i have another Training session under my IG e Project(Woodland care corner), suppose to have counciling training session that day on Friday. So quickly told boss about it.
Then i realise i am suppose to meet Qiao Min, WenChong and Serene for dinner on Sat.
Celebrating her moving house and a nice meet up. Its a long time we meet out le. times passes...

So in e end, boss say cant help me cos she needs people to work for full day, cant for half day only.
So addition to my 2 off days, i got another 2 extra off days.
So i off on tue, thurs, fri and sat.
WOW!!!

So to conclude, i only work 3 days this coming week.

Another week ahead

Another week ahead

Tomoro is another Monday, second week of my school holiday.
I start it with workin...
2moro will be working, but different from today, i will be workin at bishan 2moro.

mmm..
Actually a bit of change of workplace from Raffles city to BiShan seems to be fine with me.
Workin at e same place seems to be depressing, same as my lifestyle in RP.
haiz...
holiday comes, school starts, new class with totally new bunch of classmates, tests comes, projects comes, meetings coming, proposals, camps, CCA project, holiday comes, school starts, new class with totally new bunch of classmates, major projects comes and life goes on.

Went back to secondary school on friday with Shan, Ting, Cherly, Leng, Sandra.
Did i ever mention to them everytime they talk about the process of their poly life to our ex teachers, i am numb, prayin tat my ex teachers wont ask me.
at that point of time, i hope everyone just carry on e conversation, carry on with their plannin of their poly. with their attachments and projects.
Attachments? I am not having tat... I dont even dare to mention that.
I should be havin tat.
every moment i think of that, i would realise my life had turned upside down.
How to tell my friends, i am not havin a relaxin time though i seems to be e lucky one with out worries about attachements and projects and exams.
Everytime they discuss about how tense are they recently due to their exams,
comparing about their course, their attachments, their results.
I am shut off... shut off. shut off to the max.





I wanted that, all i wanted is to have all those you all have.
I wanted to be studyin for the exams, stressin over attachments, stressin over the marks i have.
But all this is gone, i cant have it. I have no one to share with me about the progress. cos i cant find anything compatible between us this group of girls. I can see, can feel the way you all feel when you all discuss about school work and school life. sometimes i can see that you all wan to join me in your discussions, but just dono how to do that and whether it is a good thing not.
how to join mi in? " how is your studies in RP? how is your results? what you all doin now in school ah?" Noop... its not your faults, its mine. its my self wantin to shut off from you guys every time when come to discussion with "hows your school, hows your life". cos e questions which i listed above is what i am askin myself everyday.





last sat i finally say everything out with Dear. I thought he will just say things to stop me from thinkin all this unneccesary thoughts, but he didnt. Dear listened to all, helping me to find a better way of understanding my situation. "why should i be worrying about my future, what i wanted to do when i have not really hve the target which i want to meet" Dear told me to give myself time, i should give myself time to find my target, before dashing anyhow without direction forwards and complaining i have achieve nothing.
how is it possible to achieve anything when there is no target set infront of me. Thanks dear to be with me, sorry when i say my life is upside down now.

Pure love

Pure love



Too much thought for today.
Dear off to Ben house with Vincent in e evening today,
came with Vincent to my workplace today.
It is e last chance.
Last touch, Last kiss, Last look in his eyes, Last hug.
I am goin to miss him for almost 4 days.
Dear will be leaving for Malaysia with the guys.
I thought, really thought i dont mind a little space between us.
I thought i wont mind him not by my side for 4 days.

I am wrong, totally wrong.
I cant stop huggin him before he left,
after he left, my eyes gets so warmed that i realize i am crying.
I cant believe how much our love becomes.

On phone with dear after work, I feel happy to hear his voice.
When i told him i thought i had become dependent on him le.
dependent on him accompany work, sent mii home, hug mii before i went home.
Dear actually ask me back, dont i think it is a good thing that we both had become
dependent on each other.
I have a very deep thought on that.

When reach home, mom start to 'lecture' me about boyfriend topic.
About compatible, about future, about trustworthy.
Dear called me when i sms him about this.
When chatting, i realize and feel how much he treasure our relationship.
He is not only looking into our love, but also the acceptance of my parents.
He is worried, and i felt really sorry about it.
I really wanted him to know that it is not that he is not good, its just the acceptance of
my parents is different.

Dear, our love will prove it.
I will remember everything you say tonight, every messages and every bits of your thoughts.
Same as you, i cant imagine me loving another guy more like you in my life.
Thanks for the promises you made, I will keep it... keep it safe in my heart.
whether we are meant for each other, time will prove it.
I love you love me.
Believe me, i really really feel your love.





Hope you enjoy your trip ahead.
Now i understand your feeling when u get angry when i told you i am goin for another camp le.
We had a far way to go from here.
Misses.